Sunday, February 17, 2019

Hinomaru Sumo BANNED from Anime Awards (Parody)


How dare Crunchyroll not respect "Thicc Bois the Anime"!?!?


Last night Crunchyroll hosted the Crunchyroll Anime Awards Presented by Devil May Cry 5. It was a night that was supposed to celebrate the best that anime had to offer in 2018. Series like That Time I Got Reincarnated as a Slime, My Hero Academia, Zombie Land Saga, Boku no Hero Academia, Devilman Crybaby, and My Hero Academia the Movie: Two Heroes finally got the attention that they have always deserved. 

While the awards were pretty much perfect and no one had anything to complain about, I couldn't help but notice that something was missing. There was one anime that brought a lot to the table in 2018 and it wasn't even mentioned throughout the entire awards show. 

If you somehow didn't read the title of this blog post, you're probably thinking, "What anime could possibly have been snubbed by Crunchyroll?", and I'll tell you! It's definitely not Maquia, since no one has even seen that movie (or I haven't seen it) or cares about it. No, the anime that Crunchyroll spat on throughout the Anime Awards was Hinomaru Sumo.

Obviously Hinomaru Sumo is such a popular anime that I don't have to explain it, but since I don't know where I'm going with this blog post, I'll explain it anyway. Hinomaru Sumo is about Hinomaru Ushio, a high school sumo wrestler who dreams of becoming the highest ranking sumo wrestler in the world. The only problem is that Hinomaru is a short guy in a sport dominated by giants that are almost five-times his size. 

But Hinomaru is not deterred, and he helps put together a ragtag team of amateur sumo wrestlers who  each have their own dreams that they want to achieve through sumo wrestling. Hinomaru Sumo is a sports anime with intense action, great characters, and plenty of laughs. It's got a little something for everyone and yet it wasn't even nominated for a single category in the Crunchyroll Anime Awards.



Best Protagonist? Best Boy? Anime of the Year? Hinomaru Sumo had a chance to win in at least one of those categories if it was nominated. It's almost an injustice, but a true injustice is that Hinomaru Sumo wasn't nominated and didn't win Best Opening Sequence and Best Ending Sequence. Seriously, just listen to the Opening and the Ending and tell me that I'm wrong. To put it simply, Hinomaru Sumo's Opening and Ending are literally lit, perfectly represent the hardcore action of the series, and makes you wanna sumo wrestle the closest person to you.

So why wasn't Hinomaru Sumo nominated? I don't really know and I haven't done any research, but I do have one theory that I'm going to believe no matter what facts are thrown at me. I think that Crunchyroll hates sumo wrestling. Why do they hate sumo wrestling? It might be because it's such a manly sport and Crunchyroll hates men, or maybe it's because the boys in Hinomaru Sumo aren't long legged bishounens but muscular and broad like human tanks.

So then if Crunchyroll hates Hinomaru Sumo, why is it streaming on their platform? I don't know. It could be that they're trying to hide their true agenda and don't want to cause a fuss in the anime community. What I do know is that Hinomaru Sumo was robbed and I'm not going to use Crunchyroll anymore. I will use VRV, but that's not relevant.

If you agree with me, help me bring more attention to Hinomaru Sumo and maybe watch it if you have some free time. Let's get #JusticeForHinomaruSumo trending on Twitter and expose Crunchyroll for their crimes against anime.

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